同学你好，该知识点来自沪江网校《【Uni智能】雅思7分一站式VIP-中级起点【开学季签约班】》的课程，想要更系统的学习，欢迎进入课程学习。不仅可以和更多的同学一起学习，而且还有老师、助教随时的学习指导和知识点解答哦。

同学你好~
逗号和句号应该紧跟上一个单词，不空格，和下一个单词之间空格。
I used to be a mild side tongue . But after I worked . My colleges from everywhere .  
这一句是要表达什么呢，but前的句号可以用逗号，my前的也应该用逗号，from前加谓语are

Some ones are from HuNan , SiChuan , HuBei and so on .  
ones去掉，Hunan, Sichuan这样写

I was curious How can them ate such spicy foods every day .  
how小写，can them改成they could

They answered me that How could you not try the most seasoning/ingredient in the world .  
that和how不能同时引导宾语从句。the most后面少了形容词。
可以改成：They replied that one must taste the best seasoning in the world.

I said that you have twisted my arms and I will try that .  
这句不地道，可以改成I tried.

For the beginning , Meanwhile , I drank a lot of milky tea while I burned my lips off .  
改成At first, I drank a lot of milk tea and felt my lips burning.

That so really cool the burn .
that要指代清晰，cool应该用过去式

I didn't tap out during I built up my tolerance to spicy foods .
这句话意思表达得不够清晰，而且during后面也不直接加从句。

Finally I gain an iron stomach !
时态应该是过去时。

作文可以提交到作业贴哦
https://class.hujiang.com/topic_v2/4143136/

祝同学学习进步~